Feeling Overwhelmed During Conflict?

Have you ever been in an argument with your partner and wondered at what point they went absolutely mad?  The person you know as reasonable is no longer on the other side of the conversation, instead replaced by someone impossible to deal with in a rational way.

If you have felt this way before, you were likely feeling flooded.  Flooding happens when you are in conflict with your partner and you stop thinking.  You feel overwhelmed and respond by either attacking your partner or completely shutting down.  At this point, in order for the conversation to be productive, it is important that you find a way to calm down.  

In this quick video, Dr. Julie Gottman describes the research behind what is happening when you are feeling flooded and what you can do when this happens.