Living in a Sex Starved Marriage?

Michele Weiner Davis is a renowned therapist and author who has dedicated much of her career to helping couples navigate through marital issues, particularly those related to intimacy and sexuality. One of her notable works is centered around the concept of sex-starved marriages, where one partner desires more sexual intimacy than the other.

In her approach, Weiner Davis emphasizes the importance of communication, understanding, and empathy in addressing the complexities of sexual desire imbalances within a marriage. She acknowledges that differing levels of sexual desire are common in relationships and that it's crucial for couples to openly discuss their needs and concerns without judgment or criticism.

Weiner Davis often highlights the role of societal norms and expectations in shaping couples' attitudes towards sex and intimacy. She encourages couples to challenge traditional notions of sexuality and explore ways to redefine intimacy that are meaningful and fulfilling for both partners.

One of the key strategies Weiner Davis advocates for is the concept of "initiator" and "refuser" roles within the relationship. She encourages couples to identify these roles and work together to shift the dynamics in a way that fosters mutual desire and satisfaction. This may involve exploring new sexual experiences, experimenting with different forms of intimacy, and prioritizing emotional connection alongside physical pleasure.

Additionally, Weiner Davis emphasizes the importance of addressing underlying issues that may be contributing to sexual dissatisfaction within the marriage. This could include factors such as stress, unresolved conflicts, past traumas, or medical conditions. By addressing these issues collaboratively, couples can create a more supportive and nurturing environment that promotes sexual intimacy and fulfillment.

Overall, Michele Weiner Davis' work offers valuable insights and practical strategies for couples struggling with sex-starved marriages. By fostering open communication, empathy, and a willingness to explore new possibilities, couples can overcome challenges related to sexual desire imbalances and cultivate a deeper, more satisfying connection with each other.

In this Ted Talk Michelle Weiner-Davis discusses Sex Starved Marriages.  She also discusses 3 things people need to do if they are living in a Sex Starved Marriage.

  1. Understand how you feel connected to your partner, but most of all, become an expert in how your partner feels connected to you.

  2. If you are with someone desiring more connection, more affection, or more sex don't delude yourself into thinking "it's just sex." Sex is a powerful way to connect and bond with someone you love.

  3. When you understand how your partner feels connection and love you don't have to understand or agree with it, you just have to DO IT!